I often feel like Jesus' disciples before Pentecost.
It's as if I'm starting to get it but there are a lot of things I'm missing. Like Peter confessing Christ one moment and then completely misunderstanding what that means the next moment. That's why the story of the blind man who was touched twice proceeds Peter's confession. Peter understands Jesus' title but misunderstands the implications. He thinks Messiahship is all about victory, conquering and glory when Jesus is trying to tell him its about victory through suffering, conquering through sacrifice, and glory in humility. The blind man represents the disciples. They have started to see, but at the time, only see people that look like trees walking. It is only after Pentecost that they fully see and understand.
I think I am that blind man. My vision has been partially restored. Whereas before I was blind I now can see. But something is still off, people look like trees, I'm still waiting for the picture to be made clear.
I'm still waiting for Pentecost.
How can I still be waiting for Pentecost?
How can I be a member of the people of God and yet feel that I do not possess the Spirit of the new age?
Well, you do.
Okay, I love these anonymous and enigmatic one-liners that I get every now and again.
If I knew who wrote this I might have a better sense for what they mean. The reason why I allow anonymous posts is because y’all don’t have livejournals – I’d still appreciate you letting me know who you are.
What do you mean? “Well… you do”? That could mean that, “well, you do in fact possess the Spirit” or “Well, that’s the way you feel… so suck it up already” or something along those lines. Of course there could be other meanings as well but those two are both obvious and divergent enough to demonstrate my point.
If you meant either of those things could you explain yourself a little more???
I would guess that your first interpretation was the correct one. I’m guessing the person meant that even if you don’t feel like the Spirit is with you he still is. And if that’s not what the person meant then I offer you that thought myself. -JAG
Hey Dan…it’s me…Jude…I wrote that line…I thought it might bug you a bit.
So here’s what I was thinking. I believe you have the spirit of God in you. I see it.
Now here’s what I’ve been thinking. The other day someone said something significantly encouraging about me. It came from an almost stranger and was some of the kindest, most beautiful words someone has said about me. The thought in my head was: damn, the only way for that compliment to be true is if the spirit of God is in me. They must not be seeing me but the spirit in me. This surprised me (and gave me a lot of hope) because I’ve wondered a lot recently whether or not I have this spirit. So I wonder if the spirit is something that other people recognize in us but we have trouble seeing in ourselves???? There is fruit or evidence of this spirit that other people pick up on??????
Back to you. I can’t speak for you as to why you question this yourself. But what I see in you I believe to be of God. I see that you’ve picked up he cross, you are suffering for it and with others, and there is something glorious coming through it all. Those who are journeying with you are receiving warmth, love, hope, caring, etc. If you are just manufacturing this stuff yourself I’d be shocked. Especially if you were capable of manufacturing it with some of the shit you’ve been through, yourself and with others. And this is powerful stuff. It is a powerful thing for someone to go through pain and then develop deep compassion (I like the definition of compassion – “to suffer with”). I also wonder if you didn’t have the spirit in you how you would act? That is, would you be as peaceable as you are? Would you be non-violent? Would you become consumed with anger and rage? I don’t know the answer to those questions.
Anyways, I’d love to hear your thoughts further.
lots of love,
Jude
one more thing…I think you can have the spirit and still feel like people are trees walking, or that you are still waiting for Pentecost. Is this not part of the whole kingdom here but not yet here?
jude
last thing…before I could post my last comment the website here just made me confirm that I was a human. What the hell?
Jude